Trying to Prove Myself to the world – by Jeremy

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To watch Jeremy’s video, click here.

So, I was lying face down on my bed. It was about 4am, one night in my first year at university and I was feeling absolutely exhausted, but my heart was still pumping with the caffeine from red bull & pro plus.

I had just done another all-nighter to complete an essay for the next day. The reason I had to do this was because my life was full of so much activity. I went to university & immediately got involved in helping to run the student newspaper and in lots of other clubs & societies. I even went on to run my own business whilst I was at university.

I got involved in all these activities as I was trying to build the perfect CV – to achieve as much as possible. I was constantly comparing myself with my classmates – trying to make sure I was doing better than them.

I was trying to prove myself to the world. I had been bullied as a teenager & I was working hard so I could turn around to the bullies & say, “I’m better than you” or be so successful that they couldn’t hurt me.

Fast forward to my second year and my business was going well. In fact, I had achieved much of what I had set-out to do, but I still felt unsatisfied, in fact, I felt as insecure as ever.

When I saw that I would never be satisfied by achieving my dreams, I turned to God.

I hadn’t come from a Christian family, but I had become interested in Jesus during my teenage years. When I had read the new testament, he had captivated me with his authority and the power of his words.

I realised that my life without God was empty. I had ignored him for much of my life and needed his forgiveness.

With the help of a friend, I prayed to Jesus to give him control of my life & to ask him for his forgiveness for a life lived without him.

After that, my life really started to change.

I started to understand the message of God’s unconditional love – that I was loved and forgiven by my father in heaven – regardless of what I’d done or achieved. I didn’t need to prove myself to Him – he already loved & accepted me! This meant I didn’t need to prove myself to other people either!

This really changed me – I felt I could let go of a number of these activities & gave up my business. I started to live a more balanced life. I changed so much that my housemates were like, “Who are you & what have you done with the guy we used to live with?”

I also started to relate to people very differently. God started to give me love for people around me in a way that I didn’t have before. Previously, I had used people to get ahead & be as successful as I could. Now, God helped me to see the value people had & I started to develop deeper relationships with those around me.

Most of all, as I started to develop a friendship with God, I came to experience a peace & a joy that I had never experienced before.

Really interested to hear what people think about God. You can message me on this site, contact me personally or watch the video below!

Jeremy

 

If you want to contact Jeremy, please visit this website.

5 Comments

  1. Cindy on 23/05/2018 at 4:26 PM

    Jeremy I agree with you. Life would so much easier if we stop trying to please man an put all our trust in or Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. There is no better friend than Jesus.

  2. Golden mwansa on 05/03/2019 at 7:25 AM

    Jesus is the only solution to achieve all our sin ,if you believe in his name everything will be better in your life .

  3. Victoria on 29/04/2019 at 9:14 PM

    Wow this is amazing! I would say I went through the exact same thing: striving to achieve to prove the bullies wrong, using people to get ahead, doing almost everything for that life goal. As a result, though I could say I had this number of friends on paper, I knew within me that they were not deep meaningful friendships; I had to stop myself one-day when I realised that yes, I had God and I spoke to God and God loved me and I loved God but in what way was I showing this love out to others?? I felt deeply convicted by the Holy Spirit that day and I stopped living for myself from then on, I stopped chasing vain ambition and started really opening my eyes to look around me, to see that there were people who needed even just my presence, people whom God wanted to use me for. When asked by His disciples what the greatest commandment was Christ’s Response was: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and all your mind. And love your neighbor as you love yourself. And now I know why these were the greatest commandments because nothing more brings life and joy, peace and fulfillment. Nothing else comes close. So the bullies will have to keep waiting but as for me I have chosen life.

    • Dawn on 01/09/2019 at 4:25 PM

      I am so happy for you Victoria. Believe!

  4. Dawn on 01/09/2019 at 4:23 PM

    Hi Jeremy! I am so elated that you have brought Our Lord and Savior into your life!
    I found that after I let go and surrendered my soul to God, I no longer needed to impress anyone around me. I was more outgoing where people were concerned (I was a loner and an introvert because I was/am bipolar). It is very enlightening to know you have Jesus on your side as you go through this life on earth. I am/feel so happy and free now, I found I have a PURPOSE! I even smile – and I never smile! My heart and soul feel the warmth within and it is the Utopia of thoughts and feelings. Praise GOD! I have been so close to Our Lord that I felt as though THE questions had been answered. It truly is AMAZING! My Soul is FREE! Thank you Heavenly Father, I love you, thank you for loving me and never giving up on me! LET GO, LET GOD!
    Bless you!

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