Jesus and I
There are so many people telling you their story about how Jesus changed their lives. And it’s not a simple formula nor is it the same for everyone. We are all loved by our Creator. We are all on our journey through our lives. We all carry our history and experiences with us. We all need a Saviour.
I remember one night specifically I was very upset about something, and I decided to text a friend. When I picked up my phone, I realized I had no one to text. I was filled with so much self pity, sadness, and loneliness, so I just started talking to God.
As I went from one meaningless adventure to the next I ended up on a bench by the river in Bristol city centre. I had never felt so alone in my life.
I fear that people can see right through me—can they see how depressed and lonely I feel inside, how completely helpless and overwhelmed I am, how anxious my every thought is.
Right around the age of 19, I then started having doubts. Do I only believe in God because my parents immunized faith into me? Does Jesus really exist?
The death of my grandmother was a real shock to me. For the first time in my life I started to think what would happen to me if I die.
It was at primary school, with my friends who went to Sunday school, I heard about God for the first time. I was more afraid than envy. Being young, I was afraid of the future and dark.
“If this is all there is, then what’s the point?”
That describes how I felt about life as a young adult. My life lacked purpose and fulfillment. I just existed.
God has done so many great things in my life. He has helped me through tough times and answered so many prayers – even the small everyday things. At times when I have been greatly stressed I learnt to give all my worry over to him and as a result felt complete peace and joy in the midst of all that was going on – and that is simply incredible!
So, I was lying face down on my bed. It was about 4am, one night in my first year at university and I was feeling absolutely exhausted, but my heart was still pumping with the caffeine from red bull & pro plus.